God could be using your season of singleness to perfect you for no ordinary marriage but a kingdom one.
—p. 251, All Good Just a Week Ago
Monica told us she didn’t get down on the first night. But what about the second date? And the one after that?
When we introduced our audience to the concept of kingdom dating, we didn’t know how our readers would respond.
Kingdom dating is not popular in today’s culture. Even if people hold off sex, they will rarely wait to enjoy their partner sexually until marriage. But this is what kingdom dating is all about.
While we encourage kingdom dating, we are also fully aware of the challenges that exist.
The absence of sex in a relationship doesn’t mean the lack of temptation. When you and your partner have a strong connection, it can be challenging to remain pure. But it’s not impossible.
Here are some tips that will help you fight temptation while dating.
Set boundaries and stick to them.
Temptation doesn’t disappear just because you decided to become celibate. Set those boundaries. If you reflect on the days when you gave in to temptation, you will identify why it was easy to cross those sexual boundaries.
Maybe you were drunk from a night out with your friends. Or did you agree to a simple Netflix & Chill after 10:00 pm? These small yet impactful decisions are what lead to falling prey to temptation. Start creating strategies that will help you conquer temptation while dating.
Know your triggers. We live in an overly sexualized culture. For some, it’s normal to hit up the strip club or watch porn. But it doesn’t even have to be that deep.
They can hear a particular song or watch a certain movie and end up hot and bothered. Identifying triggers will help you stay clear from temptation.
Remember why you chose to wait. On most occasions, the decision to wait starts while you are single with no prospects. It seems easy. But when you cross paths with an attractive and charming man or woman, the wait can seem unbearable. Write down at least five reasons you are choosing to wait. When times get rough, go back to that piece of paper so you can remind yourself why you chose the wait.
Communicate your stance. Your potential bae should know your views about sex before marriage early on in the relationship. Taking sex off the table will show you a lot about your prospective partner.
Talk to like-minded friends. If you are the only one in your circle practicing the wait, you may feel like the black sheep. Having friends with the same outlook is a great way to stay encouraged while keeping your head in the dating game and remaining pure.